Donald "Joe Millionaire" Trump: Sieg heil! (Gott helfe uns allen!)
Ted Cruz: First, let's shut down the government. Great, now that's done...What? What do we do next? Um...um...um...
Marco Rubio: Establishment tool.
Ben Carson: The only honest man running, which is why he's behind in the polls.
John Kasich: He is ok too, except for his plan to wipe out ISIS. The last two presidents tried wiping out Islamist groups, and failed. If Kasich gets elected, we still haven't learned the law of holes: If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
Hillary Goldman Clinton: Psst? Hey buddy? Vote for me, ok? I'll make you rich...and beautiful...
Bernie Sanders: Kaiser Wilhelm introduced socialist programs in pre-WWI Germany. Lenin brought and expanded them to Russia. During the 20th century, most European nations and China added them. Between outright failure, and bankrupting countries, socialism has failed everywhere, or had to be severely overhauled to keep going. With success like that, let's bring it to America!
(hat tip to iamapaladin at flickr.com for the pic)
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